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Simpsons Quotes

Inspirational Quotes


"Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem."
Short and funny quote by, Bill Vaughan.


"I am at two with nature."
Short and funny quote by, Woody Allen.


"Operator! Give me the number for 911!"
Short and funny quote by, Homer J Simpson.


"I intend to live forever. So far, so good."
Short and funny quote by, Steven Wright.


"Beware of the young doctor and the old barber."
Short and funny quote by, Benjamin Franklin.


"Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy."
Short and funny quote by, Groucho Marx.


"Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races."
Short and funny quote by, Homer J Simpson.


"If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button."
Short and funny quote by, Sam Levenson.


"I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do."
Short and funny quote by, Phyllis Diller.


"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths."
Short and funny quote by, Steven Wright.


"When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room."
Short and funny quote by, Woody Allen.



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